{"id":1584,"date":"2016-09-28T22:00:43","date_gmt":"2016-09-28T19:00:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.maribranze.ro\/maribranze\/?p=1584"},"modified":"2017-04-20T13:31:24","modified_gmt":"2017-04-20T10:31:24","slug":"legenda-trenului-ir1522","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.maribranze.ro\/maribranze\/legenda-trenului-ir1522\/","title":{"rendered":"Legenda trenului IR1522 [Proz\u0103 scurt\u0103]"},"content":{"rendered":"

H\u0103rmes-B\u0103rmes, zeul autohton al c\u0103l\u0103toritului, cerificat cu \u0219apte diplome, cinci onoruri \u0219i zece articole \u00een presa local\u0103, st\u0103tea tol\u0103nit pe canapeaua lui de piele, ron\u021b\u0103ind jeleuri \u0219i sc\u0103rpin\u00e2ndu-se pe dup\u0103 ceaf\u0103 cu unghia degetului mic de la m\u00e2na st\u00e2ng\u0103.
\n\u00cen fa\u021ba lui, r\u00e2nd pe r\u00e2nd, \u0219oferi de toate felurile, vatmani, c\u0103pitani \u0219i \u0219efi de tren soseau \u0219i \u00eei pupau t\u0103lpile, aduc\u0103ndu-i ofrande \u0219i sper\u00e2nd la un patronaj responsabil pe durata \u00eentregii c\u0103l\u0103torii.<\/p>\n

-Tu o s\u0103 ai aer condi\u021bionat prea puternic \u00een autocar \u0219i o s\u0103 te \u00eenjure babele – zise H\u0103rmes, desf\u0103c\u00e2nd cu poft\u0103 \u00eenghe\u021bata de vanilie cu fulgi de migdale \u0219i topping de sirop de ciocolat\u0103 adus\u0103 de un \u0219ofer de Dacos.
\n-Tu o s\u0103 ui\u021bi s\u0103 schimbi macazul \u0219i o s\u0103 ajungi \u00een cealalt\u0103 parte a Bucure\u0219tiului – flutur\u0103 el m\u00e2na non\u0219alant c\u0103tre o vatmani\u021b\u0103 care \u00eei oferise \u0219ampanie.
\n-Tu o s\u0103 ai parte de ambuteiaj de o jum\u0103tate de or\u0103!
\n-Tu o s\u0103 te iei dup\u0103 GPS \u0219i o s\u0103 nimere\u0219ti p\u00e2n\u0103 \u00een curtea unui mo\u0219 care \u00ee\u0219i face du\u0219 improvizat cu apa curg\u00e2nd din g\u0103leat\u0103!
\n-Tu accident u\u0219or cu un taximetrist care vorbe\u0219te la telefon!
\n-Tu pasageri care se iau la b\u0103taie!
\n-Amend\u0103 c\u0103 e\u0219ti sub limita legal\u0103 de vitez\u0103!
\n-Blocaj din cauza unei turme de 300 de oi!
\n-Pas\u0103re care face caca pe parbriz!
\n-Miros de ou\u0103 stricate!
\n-Iar tuuuuuu!
\n\u0218i H\u0103rmes se \u00eentoarse spre \u0219eful de tren de la IR1522, care \u00eei oferise o pung\u0103 de pufarine \u0219i una de pufule\u021bi, ambele topite \u00een soare.
\n-S\u0103 ai geamuri sparte! Scaune jegoase! Lips\u0103 de aer condi\u021bionat \u0219i temperaturi de 50 de grade! \u00cent\u00e2rziere de o or\u0103! Vagoane \u0219i scaune nenumerotate \u0219i c\u0103l\u0103tori aglomer\u00e2ndu-se ca fraierii la locul gre\u0219it! Pierderea leg\u0103turilor cu alte trenuri! Opriri nejustificate \u00een mijlocul c\u00e2mpului! Lichide v\u0103rsate pe jos de ani \u00eentregi \u0219i gume de mestecat lipite peste tot!
\n\u0218i H\u0103rmes ron\u021b\u0103i pufarinele, mul\u021bumit de sentin\u021b\u0103.<\/span><\/p>\n

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*<\/p>\n

A\u0219a a ajuns trenul \u00een care m\u0103 aflu s\u0103 fie at\u00e2t de na\u0219pa.<\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

Scris \u00een tren pe 10 septembrie, \u00een drum spre Bucure\u015fti.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"tren\"<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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